Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Worst Martial Artist Ever?

Yeah, probably something you've already thought of before, but I'd like to point it out here anyway. Exactly why was The Karate Kid [1984] such a monumental achievement in cinema? Granted, I was once a fan too. But in my defense I was also about eleven years old, and I used to think the guys of Motley Crue were macho.

Note the near absence of testosterone...
I'm not a tough guy, nor do I pretend or claim to be. But I do have plenty of common sense to go around, and I've invested some time actually learning how to fight (though I never was any good at it, I hate hurting people). But what I'm saying here is that sometimes, whoever choreographed or directed these fictional martial artists, they are not practitioners themselves which is why we ended up with this;

Feel free to watch the whole thing, my bone is with the infamous Crane Kick at 14:20

Okay, so what's the problem here? It's flashy, sure. But I have no problem with that. Instead, look at this image here.

There are several ways he could handled this situation...
The dude can barely balance himself, a swift low-kick would have done wonders
The Karate Kid couldn't have used his range to his advantage, so how about a side-kick?
Simply put, anything that doesn't involve putting both your hands down, your head held up high and rush head-first into the one area where he can hit you with an obviously pre-planned kick?

Anything but this...
Oh don't tell me he couldn't have seen that coming. What did he think the Karate Kid was putting his arms up for? The most damage he could have done was something the equivalent of a bear hug.

Cobra Kai my ass...

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