Sunday, May 27, 2012

5 Actresses Other People Are Crazy About But I Have No Feelings For

The title's a little long, ain't it? But then again, it seems like so long ago since I wrote an entry of this nature, this whole countdown thing. I'm afraid I have no defense this time, I've been slacking off. I tend to do that. It's just that part of my personality where I would take some time off when I feel like it has become too much of a routine. So no, Planet MamüVies is not dead. So what have I been doing all this while? Same old, same old. It's just this blog that took the backseat.

But enough about that. I felt like writing again, and the first thing I did is scour through the drafts for a topic I'd like to revisit, and this one piqued my interest. What can I say? I love women. I love men too, but I love women a whole lot more. If I remember correctly, this article was inspired by all those nonsensical "20 Hottest Actresses Under 25/Over 30/Over 35/Over 40... etc" Hollywood tabloid journalism likes to do.

I still don't get what's the big deal about this lady. Or that Megan Fox substitute in Transformers 3...
Which, by the way, is something I vowed to never incorporate into this blog. No, seriously. Even at my trashiest, I'd rather not take a page from the E! channel. So how is this article any different from anything they've ever done? Simple. Think of it as an Anti-Hottest Celebrities list. I'm gonna list down five actresses the TV and internet wouldn't shut up about, and say a thing or two about me not getting what the fuss is all about.

Of course, it goes without saying that none of them would date me either.

#5 Christina Hendricks

I never thought I'd ever say this about a redhead, but I really don't get what's the big deal about Christina Hendricks. Now, before you point to her chest or ask me to Google for her cup size, I'm not blind. I guess that's where we differ. Although I don't care all that much about a woman's physique, I do draw the line on how big can breasts be before I'd freak out. And yes, I passed up on the chances to make some lame puns involving her chest.

I prefer this redhead instead:

Alyson Hannigan
#4 Jennifer Lawrence

This space was empty back when this entry was still in draft form, and a good thing too because I get to address this other bewilderment I'm having. Yes, The Hunger Games was not too bad. Yes, Jennifer Lawrence was spectacular as the anti-Bella Swan. But I feel like it's a little unfair for people to tout her only as a 'hottie' when in actuality, she's a pretty good actress. As far as sex appeal is concerned, she looks kinda ordinary to me.

If we're talking about a young 'hottie', I prefer:

Katrina Bowden
#3 Eva Mendes

Eva Mendes...? Urm, okay. I guess she was still topping the "Hottest Celebs" list at the time this entry was created. But then again, you could Google for "hottest Latin American actresses" and I bet she's still relevant there. Now, unlike everybody else on this list, I have a specific reason why I just plain don't get why people are (were?) crazy about her; Even though her physique is 100% female, I can't help but be reminded of a guy every time I look at her face. Sorry.

I prefer this lady instead:

Oona Chaplin. She has this gypsy gal quality to her that's just super hot
#2 Lisa Surihani

No, this is not sour grapes talking. Truly. Even though they say that her "stocks" plummeted since she got married, I never did find her attractive. I don't have a reason why. She's on this list only because people wouldn't shut up about what a 'hottie' she is, to the point where they tried to convince me to give Ombak Rindu a try, said that even if I ended up not liking the movie as a whole, "at least tengok Lisa Surihani dah la"... Weird.

Anyway, I prefer this local cutie instead:

Sazzy Falak. Years after Gol & Gincu [2005], I still find her adorable
#1 Megan Fox

My go-to example for an actress who practically has nothing to offer to the movie world, and the only reason why she made it this far is because Transformers fanboys are reminded of porn stars every time they look at her, the only difference being they can look at her all they want, make her their desktop wallpaper or whatever, and no one would throw them a dirty look.

But as always, I prefer:

Kate Beckinsale

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