Friday, June 29, 2012

First Look at KL Zombie

I could have sworn I've posted something about KL Zombie a while ago.

Or maybe that was just a Facebook status update. I think I wanted to wait until the release of a theatrical trailer. But then I figured it's okay to save that for another day, because I feel like it's about time that I share with you what I know about this upcoming zombie flick that I am genuinely excited about for several reasons.

For starters, the Malaysian setting. (Art by Ho Sui-Jon)
Based on the FIXI novel Zombijaya by Adib Zaini, KL Zombie tells the tale of slacker Nipis who becomes a reluctant hero when a zombie outbreak robs him of the only life he knows. At the very core, that's the story, although the book was much more substantial than that. I can't say I know for a fact how many percent of the book was retained. Author Adib Zaini, who also penned the screenplay, provided a figure in an interview. But as of right now I can't quite remember.

Not that it matters anyway.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Typical Malay Movie in 5 Easy Steps

I know what you're thinking. If you've been visiting this blog every now and then, you might be aware (wary, even) of all the blog entries taking shots at popular local movies. I don't know if I've said it before, but I definitely will say it again; I don't have a hate-boner for homemade products. I do, however, have something against a particular brand of local movie, something I hope to illustrate in this particular entry.

No, this is not a shot against local actors either.

I may not know the whole story or the politics behind movie-making, but I get the feeling that audition only happens when there's a singing competition involved. When it comes to movies, it's all about how famous you are because apparently the cult of personality is still huge over here, and the mainstream audience still think of movies as the place where they get to see celebrities/jesters/favourite singers fumble with their lines. As opposed to, you know, to watch a movie? With stories and whatnot?

So who would I blame? Everybody. The mainstream audience for flocking the cinemas for the likes of Adnan Sempit while Bunohan earned less than a million domestically.  Well... I guess it's comforting to know that Songlap and Chow Kit did quite well. But such movies are few and far in between. Most of the time, we get subpar comedies that inexplicably make millions.

And they all tend to follow the same formula;

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Popular Movies as Children's Books

My favourite among these would have to be Leon [1994], I love how this artist got Jean Reno's features down. More on its official website in all its uncropped glory.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Jiwa Taiko [2012]

Director: Osman Ali
Starring: Bront Palarae, Nadiya Nisa, Diana Danielle, Remy Ishak
Genre: Bullshit
Rating: General
Comment: "Please disperse. There's nothing to see here..."

A life of crime is a life wasted, and Firman (Remy Ishak) learns that the hard way when had to serve some time in jail. Taking the experience in good stride, he vows to never go back down that road again. He takes a step forward by getting into a relationship with Trisya (Diana Danielle), oblivious to the fact that there's another who have feelings for him. But running away from the past is always a futile effort, and it haunts him in the form of his former gang mate, Pinto (Bront Palarae).

What to Expect
1. Bront Palarae being awesome, as always
2. To be forced to accept too many things at face value
3. Plot holes aplenty, like potholes in Shah Alam
4. Characters with extremely poor judgement skills
5. Multiple, so many cringe-worthy moments
6. Remy Ishak's sex face

What NOT to Expect
1. Adrenaline-pumping fight scenes
2. Believable relationships
3. "Taiko", mostly it's just "jiwa"
Avoid like the plague

Friday, June 15, 2012

Michael Bolton & Jack Sparrow

I burst out laughing when I saw this video. I don't know, I just see it as Michael Bolton poking fun at his no-nonsense public image, belting out love songs for '90s soccer mums to swoon over. Plus there are references to popular movies.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Iceberg Wars?

I don't know who drew this, but I read that George Lucas sent this comic to James Cameron after Titanic [1997] dethroned Star Wars at the box-office. Quite frankly, it still baffles me how the former made that much money.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

The Trailer Finally Unchained

... Please ignore the lame pun.

When the trailer for this movie finally surfaced on the net, I have this vague recollection that I've written about it before. Turns out it's been more than a year since we first heard about Quentin Tarantino's latest project. Time really does fly, although now it's gonna start ticking a little slower now that the theatrical trailer's out!

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Not a Bad Cover, But...

I don't know how much of the vocals are his, and how much of it was aided by studio work. In any case, it's not too bad a cover with Tom Cruise on vocals, although the fact that Paradise City (by my favourite band, Guns N' Roses) is being used in a musical... I'm inclined to say "Blasphemy!"

But oh well.

The "unsurpassable" original version

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Snow White and the Huntsman [2012]

Director: Rupert Sanders
Starring: Kristen Stewart's Cardboard Cutout, Chris Hemsworth, Charlize Theron, Sam Spruell, Sam Claflin, Bob Hoskins, Vincent Regan
Genre: Fantasy/Action
Rating: Teen
Excerpt: "The production team created a beautiful fantasy world for us to escape to, if only Kristen Stewart knew how to react to it..."

When the kingdom comes under attack from an army of enchanted glass soldiers, King Magnus (Noah Huntley) leads an army to meet it, easily winning the battle, rescuing the gorgeous Ravenna (Charlize Theron) in the process. Taken by her beauty, he makes her his queen, filling the void left by his late wife. But things quickly take a turn for the worst as Ravenna is not what she appears. After assassinating the king, she seizes the throne, and uses her new found authority to quench her insatiable thirst to be "the fairest of them all".

Make no mistake, the real star was Ravenna (Charlize Theron)...
What to Expect
1. Charlize Theron to be absolutely captivating
2. Lush settings
3. Beautiful set pieces and costumes
4. Kristen Stewart's cardboard cutout for the non-action scenes
5. Can't help but "play director" (I'll explain)

What NOT to Expect
1. Elaborate battle scenes
2. Absence of fairy tale elements
If you have nothing to do, not even a wife or a husband

Conan O'Brien on USA's New Terrorist Alert System

I couldn't have said it any better myself. Nic Cage has his moments. For example, Lord of War [2005] is good, but mostly because the plot draws you in, and presumably because Nic Cage was on Xanax. However, the same cannot be said of the following movies; 

You know what's the funniest part? The Wicker Man [2006] wasn't even a comedy. But you wouldn't be able to tell that from watching the damn movie.

Friday, June 1, 2012

When an Aristocrat Meets a Man From the Ghetto

It may sound like the premise to a subpar sitcom, or a generic Oscar bait. But everything I've heard about The Intouchables suggests that it's anything but that. It's a French movie, so it's highly unlikely that they're gonna release it here, but hell I'd jump on the chance to go see it.

And yes, that guy does look like he could be Dustin Hoffman's French brother.
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